<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>fighters by Ilovelarry78</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27520546">fighters</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ilovelarry78/pseuds/Ilovelarry78'>Ilovelarry78</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>HunterXHunter</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Anorexia, Healing, Hisoka Amorou - Freeform, Illumi, Love, M/M, Relapsing, boylove, hisoillu, hisoka - Freeform, hunterxhunter - Freeform, illumi zoldyck - Freeform, strong language?</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-08 05:20:43</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,385</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27520546</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ilovelarry78/pseuds/Ilovelarry78</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Just a short HisokaxIllumi fic I wrote a while back.<br/>-<br/>-<br/>-<br/>Please remember that this is all fictional, meaning it’s NOT real. If you don’t like it pls don’t read.<br/>-<br/>-<br/>-<br/>This fic also has a major trigger, eating disorder, anorexia. So pls don’t read if you get triggered easily.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Hisoka/Illumi Zoldyck</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>44</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>fighters</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p class="p1"> </p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">At first it started with skipping breakfast every other day, then he convinced himself that if he didn’t need breakfast he didn’t need lunch nor dinner. And that’s how it went. Every day he will eat less than the day prior, his weight slowly going down until he wasn’t recognizable.</span>
</p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">People were worried about him and tried to help but gave up after being pushed away multiple times.</span>
</p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">There was only one person who couldn’t stop thinking or staring at him. Illumi was his name. He had gone to him and made a deal. The deal was that they would both eat something small everyday until they got used to said food then go on to something bigger and fattening.</span>
</p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">You see Illumi is just like Hisoka, anorexic. He was diagnosed with Anorexia Nervosa a year before Hisoka was, which means that both have been ‘sick’, as other would say, for a little over two and a half years now.</span>
</p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">At first this deal they had made was very hard because they were so terrified of gaining more weight than what they thought they had, but they did it.</span>
</p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">They would send pictures of what they ate that day to each other and tell the other how proud they were. There were times were they had puked up the food, but the other didn’t get mad because they knew they wouldn’t be alright for a long time and the beginning was the hardest part.</span>
</p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">Two months had passed and both Illumi and Hisoka had gained a little bit of their weight back. Once the first month had past they had moved on to the next step once they thought they were ready, but oh boy they were so wrong.</span>
</p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">Both boys had cried to each other every day before they had to eat their meal because they just couldn’t. It was too much. To many calories. Too much fat. They couldn’t!</span>
</p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">So they put it off. They slowly started falling back to their old habits.</span>
</p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">Old habits die hard they say.</span>
</p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">It wasn’t until Hisoka was hospitalized that Illumi finally decided that enough was enough. He slowly started eating more while Hisoka was kept away in the hospital. He wanted to be healthy and okay for Hisoka when he comes out so he can help him recover.</span>
</p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">One month in and Illumi was so ready to quit, but he kept going because he didn’t want to be in Hisoka’s shoes right now.</span>
</p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">Six month later Illumi has gained half of the weight he lost and Hisoka was finally out of rehab. They both looked good, but you were able to tell who actually felt good.</span>
</p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">Illumi stayed with Hisoka and was his support system for a whole year. When Hisoka finally started feeling better was when he had asked Illumi out on a date to a fancy restaurant.</span>
</p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">They were both still skeptical about what they could and could not eat, but they decided to push all their insecurities and fears to the back of their minds so they could enjoy a perfect date. </span>
</p><p class="p2">It was all going okay until someone past by them and called them freaks and fat. Everyone expected Hisoka to flinch and cower away in fear because of what he had just stuffed into his body but that wasn’t the case. I mean he did flinch a little but Illumi was the one to freak out.</p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">He started hyperventilating and had to be escorted out of the restaurant by Hisoka and another waiter.</span>
</p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">Illumi has relapsed again.</span>
</p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">It’s been five months since Illumi’s relapse and he doesn’t seem to be getting better. Every time someone tried to help him or get him to eat he would snap at them and block them out.</span>
</p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">Hisoka tried everything he had in him to help the boy he loved out but he didn’t know how. He tried everything Illumi did to help him but nothing worked. It wasn’t until he decided that he had to try a different more riskier way.</span>
</p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">He pushed Illumi away. He didn’t even talk nor look at him. When Illumi went to his room in the middle of the night because he couldn’t sleep Hisoka would ignore him and roll on his side so his back faced Illumi.</span>
</p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">Illumi has started to hurt but didn’t stop to think anything about it. Instead he continued to slowly kill himself by rejecting food for his body.</span>
</p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">Hisoka was growing annoyed by now. He knew he shouldn’t be but Illumi was being a stubborn little brat and the only way to get through his rock hard head was by telling him his wrongs.</span>
</p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">So that’s what he did. </span>
</p><p class="p2">On the day that was meant to be their one year anniversary as a couple and a year since his relapse Hisoka finally broke.</p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">He was making dinner when it happened. Illumi had came into the kitchen and started telling Hisoka that the food was too greasy and he couldn’t eat that.</span>
</p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">Hisoka swore he saw red when Illumi called himself fat. He dropped the plate of beans he had in his hands on the ground and took a firm grip of Illumi’s shoulders.</span>
</p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“Will you shut the fuck up?!” Hisoka had yelled angrily into Illumis’s face. “I have tried to play nice and let you do what you wanted but I’ve had enough. I know how fucking hard it is to let go of old habits but it’s not impossible! Look at me I fucking did it! And with your help! You helped me get better. And I will always thank you for it. Now when you relapsed a year ago today I was shattered because all the work you put into getting better went down the drain because of some fucking asshole. But I didn’t let it stop me from helping you. So for a whole year I tried many different ways to help you but all you did was snap and block me out. I understand it is hard, I really do! But you have to understand that there are many people who love you, me included, that would want to see you get better. Illumi you mean the whole world to me and seeing you slowly kill your self everyday kills me. I’ve had nights where I had to just let all this pain I felt out because I just couldn’t bear with the thought of losing you. Of not being able to help you with something you once helped me with. I know this is not a good way to talk to someone with anorexia, I fucking know but it seemed as if it was the only way to get you to listen to me.”</span>
</p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">When he finished his rant he stared at Illumi’s wide black unfocused eyes. He was almost ninety-nine percent sure that the older boy didn’t hear a thing he said.</span>
</p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">He was surprised to see Illumi nodding and slowly getting away from his grip, turning away and walking out of the kitchen. Hisoka followed him out and stared as he took a seat on the table.</span>
</p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“I am willing to try. But I do not promise you anything. I don’t know how I will get through this but I know we can do it. I am sorry for not being the best boyfriend to you.”</span>
</p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">Hisoka gave him a sad smile and walked towards him, getting on his knees beside the chair and placing his hands on the boys hips.</span>
</p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“You’ve been the best boyfriend I’ve ever wanted please don’t think other wise. We will get through this. We’re a team. I love you so much baby.”</span>
</p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">“I love you too.”</span>
</p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">And so they worked together to get better, each to their own problems. It was hard, because of course it is, nothing is ever easy, but they kept going.</span>
</p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">Three years later and they were saying their vowels in front of a church full of friends they met along their journey, each having their own journey they were going through. </span>
</p><p class="p2">Though they had gotten better over the years, they still had urges and sometimes they would slip, but they had each other to bring them back up.</p><p class="p3">
  <span class="s2">They are a team and they will continue to be one for as long as they live. </span>
</p>
  </div></div>
</body>
</html>